Fred the new family member.

Born on 25th June 2006.
Initially called 'baby Alfie' after his maw.
Then Frodo.
However, I settled with Friedrich (Fred).
Named ofcourse after my favourite philosopher, Nietzsche.

Edinburgh Probation Groupwork Programme.

My probation has entered a new phase, group work. Have know idea what the symbol means though I have my suspicions, some sort of Masonic bullshit fronting as a probation programme. I'm on to yous cunts...
On the right is Russell my New Age social-worker straight from shooting his ad for Shockwaves. The lass on the left is going to be my group leader, she was so nervous that she forgot to introduce herself, Russell surprisingly didn't say her name while I was in the room and from her signature I could only decipher the 'A' at the beginning so let's call her Anna.

Arrived early to have a walk round the nearby streets and find any shortcuts for next time. It was on Albany Street, a surprising place for a social-work office the building must be a couple of million at least; fits the rich and powerful secret society theory though.
Buzzed in and met Anna who took me through to the backroom for a tea. She seemed a little nervous and giggly like a girl on a first date. I was a bit confused but maybe she just liked my style - what? it could happen.
Russell arrived and we went through to the conference room where Anna could induct me ooh!
The poor girl couldn't stop talking to organise in her head what she was trying to say, she had a list of points in front of her but blurted out all of them in one go then continued to go through the points anyway beginning each one 'like we were just saying blablablabla bla...' it was very amusing.
After we finished with formalities it was revealed that this was only her third week, so much for liking my complete lack of style. Another trainee, they must think i'm some kinda easy ride.
Say cheese!

As for the course, 'it's split into two parts we call modules': Values and Skills.

Values: 10 - 2hr sessions
1. Introduction
2. What's important to us
3. Expectations of men
4. Developing an image
5. Effects of self and others
6. Seeing the whole picture
7. Put yourself in other's shoes
8. How does crime affect people
9. Victims of crime
10. Review

Skills: 12 - 2hr sessions
1. Intro
2. Descision making and choices
3. Knowledge/information is Power
4. Creative & 'one step ahead' thinking
5. Self control
6. Triggers to loss of self control
7. Regaining control - lifestyle
8. Communication skills
9. Non-verbal communication signals
10. Dealing with conflict
11. The art of negotiation
12. Review

I'm going to have a field day with all this, haha I can't wait...

Duddingston Loch

Arrived late at Teri's cousin's shindig, there was still time to meet the horses and have a run about though.

After they packed up we headed to the loch. As you can see Charlie took a daft-turn while drawing this morning.

Arthur's Chair from the loch.

The beautiful Duddingston Loch bird sanctuary.

Charlie is really enthusiastic about feeding the ducks.

The seagulls descend on the bread without mercy.

Quack Quack...

Silently this silly duck stalks the mighty Phoenix.

Job done, bread gone, time to go home...bye bye ducks.

Sitting up but still causing concern...

Phoenix has started sitting up without support, a massive step in the right direction.


She had an appointment with the pedestrian recently who was concerned with Fee's complete lack of concern with walking. Although she kicks out with them fine, she point blank refuses to put weight on her legs.


Nothing to be worried about, it's still early days nevertheless she is due for a follow up visit in a month to check if a specialist is needed. Upon hearing this news, thought it was time to replace the bouncer.


When Charlie tried messing about, Phoenix smacked her in the face.
'You won't break this one ya big sissy'

Ben Alder bothy trip.

Day 1 - Thursday 6th July
Left Edinburgh late just missing the 2230 bus, had to settle for the 2300 one through to Glasgow. However that meant that that I missed the last train to my dad's house in Cathcart. Although it did give me the much needed opportunity to wear in my boots on my trek from town.

Day 2 - Friday 7th July
Packed all the gear, heavy stuff in my bag and just a light pack for Dad who was trying out his new hip for the first time. Thankfully we were experimenting with charcoal rather than coal on my first long walk with a pack, which is obviously much much lighter. The coal as well as much of our food and booze was to be brought in by canoe on Saturday (more about this later).
We set off in the car for Kinloch Rannoch on a beautiful summers day, stopping off for an outdoor lunch and a pint near Pitlochry (about 30 miles from destination)

We set off, at this point I am unaware of just how long this walk is, Dad reckons it is about 5 or 6 miles. As soon as we open the car door the rain starts. The sun has been burning my arm off the whole car journey but now that we arrive, it's raining.

Weather chops and changes all the way in, but the scenery is amazing. Found a suspect track that looked like that of a large cat however because of the rain I had the camera in the bag so convieniently lack proof.

Here's the first look at Loch Ericht from here the bothy was only meant to be 20 mins, the longest fucking 20 minutes of my life. The actual time is about 70 minutes.

The track also runs out just round the corner and we have to make the last hour in through sodden marsh and hidden streams.

The beach is cool though.

Finally the relieving sight of the bothy over 3 hours and 9 miles later.

Our home for the next few days


We arrived and met Paul, Gordon and his dog Hamish, thought it would be a bit gay to whip out the camera and take their picture so here's the view from the front door of Ben Alder Cottage.

That's handy.


Bunkbeds aswell, why the hell have I been pitching a tent all these years?

A few hours later we are joined by my dad's pals Sam(right) and Alec(bottom left) not long after that we cracked open the wine. The first time I heard of the now infamous goat attack which has mentally scarred poor Sam. Mike was due in the early hours of the morning but instead we were visited by Aliens (claims Alec). A bright light lit up the trees across river for about 15 minutes, far too bright to be a headtorch and nobody appeared so it must have been a UFO eh?
My dad had been kicking me out when I rolled a J because bothies are non-smoking now. However when Paul and Gordon joined us, Gordon rolled a wee grass splif and said 'You's are good lads, you sometime get folk who complain about you smoking' haha Dad's face was a picture, and he didn't utter a word and could hardly say something after I sparked up, nae luck pal.


Day 3 - Saturday 8th July
Met Mike(far right) who had sneaked in at about 3am after I went to bed. He with Alec and Sam set off about midday to climb Ben Alder and Beinn Bheoil while my father and I collected wood and Paul, Gordon and Hamish tried to catch a fish.


After raiding the nearby peat haag of its petrified wood, Dad went off with some binoculars to look for Kenny coming down the loch on his canoe. Kenny and his canoeing club because of some last minute cancellations had decided to walk in. This meant however that we were severly short of booze; the coal wasn't missed and there was enough food but the booze...what a nightmare!

Young Andrew(left) and old timer John(middle, behind my Da) are part of Kenny's canoe club. That night was pretty crowded but we had enough booze to have enjoyable night and we were treated to a sing-song which was instigated by John, train songs or something.
[Auldyin,Paul,Sam,Kenny,Gordon&Hamish,Dad(Gordon),
Alec,Mike,Myself,Andrew]

Day 4 - Sunday 9th July
During the previous night I had agreed to hike out to retrieve wine that was to be stashed under the car. Alec, Sam and Mike left to catch the world cup final, John and Andrew were getting a lift back with them. Alec had agreed to drive to the nearest shop and get some wine to stash under the motor. Kenny went for a jog up two Munroes. The Auldyin, Paul and Gordon were leaving aswell but hung around till after I started out on my 18 mile hike for drink. So it would be only me, Dad, Kenny and the mice to fill the whole bothy tonight.


Was a bit hesitant before setting off because my left knee was a bit dodgy but not wanting to look like a pussy drove me on, I strapped it up and made my way back threw the marsh. After about an hour my knee had miraculasly healed but I could feel a niggle on my left heel. I unstrapped my knee and did my best to prevent a blister, but the marsh had taken its toll and my socks and boots were soaking so plasters wouldn't hold.


On this walk I found the most solitude I have ever found, and the bullshit of the world utterly died away. I made a point of saying to myself, just in case I might later forget, that this is a place where the world no longer exists. It is good to know such a place. It also happens to be the most apocalyptic landscape I have ever seen. It is not what you'd immediately think of when picturing a paradise, but nonetheless I found a peace there like I have nowhere else. Grey petrified wood, the remains of the ancient Caledonian forest, sticks up out of the peat bogs. A lonely outpost where hooded crows patrol, strutting through ribcages with fleece dangling. Clouds bumping through the hills revealing spells on sunshine and bringing shadows of rain roaming over the landscape.

Seven hours later I was back at the bothy. My dad and Kenny had come out to meet me for the last half hour. Before taking the bag, Kenny felt the need to apologise to me for his 'obnoxious' behaviour (haha). He wasn't obnoxious, he just disagreed with me over some point and was a bit short. Imagine apologising for that? But he felt that his behaviour was 'not on'.
My feet were killing, my left heel had a big dirty blister but it was the soles that really hurt. After a cuppa and dinner (my first taste of gumbo - nice) I was feeling able to attempt a walk outside for a joint. While enjoying that well earned J, the moon sneaked from behind Sron a Chlaonaidh and disappeared behind the forest on the right. Amazing...
After the third bottle of wine Dad and Kenny took the bunk beds while I stayed up enjoying a few more joints and the forth bottle while writing in my pad most of what i'm typing just now.

Dad caught with his pants down.

Day 5 - Monday 10th July
Packed gear, Dad left first leaving Kenny to tidy up (give him a head start), I left not long after. Kenny caught us up about half way into the journey just after I stated that he would never catch us. He had seen us about 2 miles ahead of him so with a pack on his back he jogged till he caught us - what a nutter...
Stopped for a big big breakfast in Pitlochry, after filling my stomach though I just couldn't stay awake. Poor Dad, he felt the same and me catching flies next to him didn't help matters.

Bath time Kamikaze

Charlie enjoying bath time, trying out a new chute with Baba.


Phase 1 complete, now to try it herself.


After a few successful slides on her bum it's time for something a bit more adventurous.

Kamikaze style